wank

wank
1. (wank) (4642↑, 511↓)
predominantely British term for masturbation

Buffing the Banana Holding Your Sausage Hostage Jackin' the Beanstalk Rounding up the Tadpoles Slap Boxing the One-Eyed Champ Spank the Frank Applying the hand brake Attacking the one-eyed purple-headed warrior Auditioning the finger puppets Beef-stroke-it-off Boxing the bald champ Charming the snake Checking for testicular cancer Choking Kojak Squeezing the cream from the flesh Twinkie Straddle your paddle Taking matters into your own hands Teasing the weasel Thumping the pump Tickling the pickle etc etc

Author: Master Bates http://wank.urbanup.com/68690
2. (wank) (1430↑, 533↓)
An act involving the following equipment: A. Palm with five fingers B. An errect penis If the correct equipment is present, then and only then shall this act be carried out. One must then wrap the five fingers around the fallus and then a motion similar to playing a violin played with a horsehair bow should be achieved, although alot more vigiorously, until a white substance appears from the bell shaped head of the penis and flows like blood from a exposed artery would.

Simon Sepahzad

3. (wank) (1568↑, 740↓)
a derogatory british word describing the gentle art of masturbation often misused by americans. Hence: 1)wanking- not wanking off 2)wanker- not wank 3)a situation can be a wank

1) i was wanking (when my mother walked in). i had a wank. 2) Graham is a wanker. Americans are wankers. 3) That was a wank(the film, lecture, class, job interview etc).

4. (wank) (628↑, 244↓)
1. British slang for masturbation or masturbating. 2. An on-line discuss without purpose or substance that often involves pretension and bullshit.

1. There was a guy in the park having a wank in the bushes. 2. Then the entire conversation degenerated into complete wank.

5. (wank) (547↑, 204↓)
A colloquial reference to male masturbation.

Although E. M. Forster enjoyed Virginia Woolf's company, he'd often wish she'd shut up and leave so he could enjoy a rollicking good wank in the gazeebo.

Author: Reginald Whattabone http://wank.urbanup.com/278942
6. (wank) (347↑, 93↓)
.bash the bishop .choke the chicken .yank the plank .clean the pipes .grapple the gorilla .pet the one eyed snake .stroke the salami .massage colin .toss off .shake hands with the milkman .plain old wank .greet the old chap .tommy tank
7. (wank) (236↑, 61↓)
British term to describe masturbating, sometimes known as: josseling flogging the dolphin playing tug of war pumping your fist having a "german tank" having a "down town jeremy brown" having a "five knuckle shuffle" having "one on the house" American terms include: beating off whacking off jerking off

he is upstaires having a jossel, would you like to leave a message?

8. (wank) (124↑, 42↓)
1) To run one's hand up and down the shaft of the penis repeatedly until semen shoots forth 2) To relieve sexual tension alone (males)

I was caught wanking in the school locker room. He wanked to a picture of a naked woman. It's hard to wank when I can't wrap my hand totally around my shaft.

9. (wank) (139↑, 74↓)
Wield the flesh baton to great orchestral effect.

Goodness me. Now I understand why Handel called it Water Music.

Author: Lord Jackson of Dribblespunk http://wank.urbanup.com/465793
10. (wank) (88↑, 44↓)
1.British for msturbation. 2.An insult to do with wanking (see above). 3.something shit.

1. God, I need a wank. 2.Yanks are such wankers 3.That film was wank.

11. (wank) (52↑, 14↓)
(v.) To masturbate. (adj.) A blow-off, something boring.

Bart: C'mon man, everyone knows the first day of school is a total wank\! Principal Skinner: If by 'wank' you mean 'educational experience' then by golly it is wanking time\!

Author: KaiserMonkey http://wank.urbanup.com/243059
12. (wank) (73↑, 38↓)
1. To masturbate - wank. 2. [Bullshit]

1. Im off to have a wank. 2. What a wank.

13. (wank) (43↑, 12↓)
The act of self masturbation (verb)

Hey John, wanna go catch a beer? No, I think I'm just going to go home and have a wank.

Author: terriblequiche http://wank.urbanup.com/1909814
14. (Wank) (41↑, 15↓)
Slang British term for the predominantly male act of masturbation.

I wank every day I'm dying for a wank

15. (wank) (40↑, 14↓)
to play with ones self in a sexual way\!

shaking hands with the one eyed snake. slapping the salami choking the chicken jacking off

16. (wank) (18↑, 3↓)
British English meaning either: 1) to masturbate; the act of masturbation 2) bad; poor; unsatisfactory

1) I need a wank/He is wanking 2) That music is wank

17. (wank) (16↑, 6↓)
A British term meaning jacking off or masturbating.

polishing the pipe jerkin' the gerkin massaging the lower horn releasing the pearl jam whackin' the mole jackin' the beanstalk erecting the monument lubing the tube beating around the bush wank in the tank

Author: Bobby McPherson http://wank.urbanup.com/2331126
18. (wank) (16↑, 6↓)
1. Masturbation. 2. n. Rubbish. e.g. "Don't talk wank". 3. v. To masturbate. As in "My brother wanks all the time and he's got perfect eyesight".

As in "If you have a wank every day you'll go blind".

19. (wank) (61↑, 51↓)
1) (verb) To brag excessively, usually over computer components 2) (verb) To have a meaningless discussion over abstract theories; a pissing contest 3) To masturbate

1) Fucking NICK won't stop wanking about his 386 laptop and how it was the new hotness 84 years ago. 2) The moronic intellectual was wanking off about his latest 'theorem' 3) Everytime I have a wank I wipe out a small civilization

20. (wank) (34↑, 24↓)
stroking the genitals for sexual stimulation so you can bone some hot fuck up the ass\!

i need to have a wank otherwise our date will be a right cock up.

Author: willy wanker http://wank.urbanup.com/40839
21. (wank) (18↑, 9↓)
Usally at schools Cool/Popular kids wank while the nerds are Wankers.

Once We've finished wanking we will go and get Tom to do our Homework.He's such a wanker

Author: Straight Big Cock http://wank.urbanup.com/2911004
22. (wank) (15↑, 6↓)
British source... To masturbate. Worthless.

Where's Frank? Dunno, having a wank I suppose. That heap of crap aint worth a wank.

Author: Countach Smeech http://wank.urbanup.com/262782
23. (wank) (29↑, 20↓)
1. Something i do four times a day. 2. An act usually done because of the precious milky stuff it produces. milky stuff tastes bitter, and is famous for its rejuvinating powers. 3. Causes ORGASM, the most pleasureable thing on earth.

When I'm all alone at home, I invite my friends and we wank together and mix our white liquid stuff.

Author: WANK EMPEROR http://wank.urbanup.com/231698
24. (wank) (28↑, 20↓)
To rub your penis until you get much pleasure and you shoot sweet cum.

I had a good onld wank last night, The sheets were soaked in cum\!

25. (Wank) (7↑, 1↓)
1. A slang term for masturbation that originated in Britain. 2. A word that describes something that is very poor/terrible.

1) A: "I heard Jake broke up with Charlotte" B: "Yeah, he's probably at home, wanking" 2) A: "Did you see that film?" B: "Yeah, it sucked. Utter wank."

Author: EvilFruitPie http://wank.urbanup.com/5771742
26. (wank) (9↑, 3↓)
To wank- masturbate Or...that was wank (describing something shit)

John:fuck i need a wank...the bitch didnt giv any last night Ben:oh man that sucks John:that film last night was shit Ben: yeah it was fuckin' wank

Author: jordannnnnnn http://wank.urbanup.com/2899969
27. (Wank) (6↑, 2↓)
To tickle the kipper.

Slang: 'I just tickled my kipper' Real Meaning: 'I just had a wank'

Author: Carlos Jones http://wank.urbanup.com/2864383
28. (wank) (9↑, 5↓)
Really bad, just generally rubbish

e.g 'fuck me, that journey was WANK'

29. (wank) (14↑, 10↓)
A pleasurable experience that most males and about half of females experience regularely in their lifetime. The way a male would experience this would be to grab the shaft of the erect penis and rapidly moving the foreskin up and down until a climatic experience is reached and semen is rushed out of the penis.

1) i was wanking in the kitchen 2) my parents were gone so i had a wank 3) my friends wank but i don't want to 4) i don't know how to wank 5) i love to wank

30. (wank) (19↑, 15↓)
Wank is the slang term for masturbation or if you're annoyed at someone you call them a fucking wank.

1) *Stroke* *Stroke* *Splat* *Splat*

31. (Wank) (4↑, 1↓)
1) British slang referring to the act of masturbation 2) A term among guitarists to describe random and excessive riffing at usually high speed as if one is jerking off the guitar.

1) I'll bet you like to wank for hours on end to pictures of men's asses 2) Many think Synyster Gates is a great guitarist but all he does is wank

32. (Wank) (15↑, 12↓)
to masterbate, to slap it, to jack it, to smack it, to fondle oneself.

Ali Ansari wanks off to Sly.

33. (wank) (18↑, 15↓)
Something that is offensively crap, lame, or generally bollocks.

what a pile of wank\!

34. (wank) (4↑, 2↓)
west bank of New Orleans, LA

My friend Mark lives on the [Wank]

35. (wank) (3↑, 1↓)
a wank refers to young men who choose to wear singlets or no shirt over a t-shirt. they are commonly rugby league players or beach folk who like to share special moments with each other. 'Wanks' dont like to wear shoes while playing sports and always think they are better then anyone else.

look at those wanks playing footy with no shirt on.

Author: absolute,dev http://wank.urbanup.com/4236012
36. (wank) (4↑, 2↓)
Ridiculous, annoying or stupid; usually refers to a bad outcome or situation

"I got kicked off the bus today 'cause I was 10p short" "Man, that's wank" "I lost my whole essay today, the computer was being wank and restarted." "I have 9am lectures every day this week" "That's wank."

Author: Carolyn Pitt http://wank.urbanup.com/1497624
37. (wank) (27↑, 25↓)
British word for masturbating

Quit wanking off\!

38. (Wank) (2↑, 1↓)
This word is the British equivalent of jerkin off so if someone calls you a wanker...they say you jerk off.

Harry: GTFO you wanker\! Jason: Smd

39. (wank) (11↑, 10↓)
Brittish term, to describe the art of male genital stimulation (masturabating), or to describe a person. NOTHING ELSE\!\!, not "wanking off" or "hes a wank". usually totall idiots who call other people wankers as it is a pathetic insult, but a very good way to describe the act\!\! Noun:wanker Verb:past, wank (had a wank), present: wanking, having a wank, future: wank (gonna go home and have a wank)

Random person 1:I was lookin at some great porn last night, and had a realy good wank\!\!\!\! Random person 2:realy? well, i was talkin to that wanker from school after he showed up at my house Random person 3: shut up you pair of wankers\!\!

Author: An English teen who uses the word on a semi-regular basis http://wank.urbanup.com/1660519
40. (wank) (11↑, 10↓)
1) British term referring to the male method of relieving sexual tension; esp. used by those males with no relationships 2) [Masturbating]

I was caught wanking in the showers at school. He wanked to a picture of a naked woman

41. (wank) (13↑, 12↓)
To give one's self a pleasure rub. An expression used if something isnt very good.

Last night i watched back door sluts 9 and had a great WANK over it. Karl: Have you heard of the band HIM? Me: Yes. I have. Karl: I am going to see them live. Me: Gutting. That is quite devastating as they Are the WANKest band on this earth. Even more wank than finch

42. (wank) (26↑, 25↓)
Verb - The act of readjusting ones underwear vigorously during a film on channel 5 (uk).

Channel 5(uk) - what a load of wank\!\!\!\!

43. (wank) (14↑, 13↓)
the process of holding your fingers around your hard penis and moving it to and fro until some white silky liquid shoots 10 feet into the air.

I caught him wanking in the highway.

44. (wank) (12↑, 11↓)
wank means, Fondle the genitals.

"I`m feeling horney, I think I shall have a wank." Also used as swear word, "You are a wanker"

45. (wank) (0↑, 0↓)
the equivalent for fuck in the U.K./basically another work for fuck used in the U.K.

Evike: So how was last night with your boyfriend? Tervon: shut the wank up tit\!\!\! a shemale isn't a boy\!\!

Author: ihateu(:':(0_0):':)u http://wank.urbanup.com/6337636
46. (Wank) (1↑, 1↓)
A word that means "[bag] that carrys other bags inside" in some australian [aboriginal] dialects

Put your kangaroo in your yellow bag, your emu in your blue bag and put both of them in your wank

47. (Wank) (2↑, 2↓)
the collective noun for a group of penises or peni, presumably attached to a body.

Look at that wank of law students who think they're all that and a bag of kettle chips, taking up all the seats in the cafeteria.

48. (Wank) (6↑, 6↓)
The act of wanking.

If you don't shut up i will wank on you. Damn, that girl is fine, I would like to wank her.

Author: Marissa Babazadeh http://wank.urbanup.com/3164892
49. (Wank) (5↑, 5↓)
Wank - verb (wanked, past tense) 1. the act of jerking off 2. jerking off so hard that you dislocate your shoulder

That guy over there with the sling, he wanked so hard that he dislocated his shoulder\!

50. (Wank) (3↑, 4↓)
To masturbate rigorously to eventually force ejaculation. Its first known use was by Jane Austen in Pride and Prejudice:

Sir William Lucas: Oh, Miss Eliza, why are you not dancing? - Mr. Darcy, allow me to present this young lady to you as a very desirable partner. You cannot refuse to dance, I am sure, when so much beauty is before you. Elizabeth Bennet: Indeed, Sir, I have not the least intention of dancing. Please don't suppose that I moved this way in order to beg for a partner. Mr. Darcy: I would be very happy if you'd do me the honour of dancing with me, Miss Bennet. Elizabeth Bennet: Thank you, but excuse me, I am not inclined to dance. Mr Darcy: Miss Bennet, please then do me the honour of walking you to the study, allowing me to [wank] over your shadow and to cast [jism] all over your [tits]. Elizabeth Bennet: Mr Darcy, that is a most favourable suggestion\!

Author: SirWankerLot http://wank.urbanup.com/5190972
51. (Wank) (2↑, 3↓)
Mainly used when insulting someone of the male species, as it applies to them all. Can also be used as a term of frustration.

'You Wank'. 'Ohh Wank'.

Author: KimSisiTessa http://wank.urbanup.com/2882642
52. (wank) (8↑, 9↓)
1. abusive meaning for someone that masturbates 2. crude meaning for masturbation

abusive meanings 1. my boss is a fucking wanker 2. what a fucking cunt of a wank he was 3. go fuck yourself you fucking zygote wanker 4. wankers should be done for 5. get fucked you fucking wank crude meanings 6. i had a wee wank this morning 7. i hate when skeet spurts out your dick after a wank 8. i don't like wanking 9. might as well have a wank a quickie of the wrist 10. i never wank off ever

Author: lucas bolton http://wank.urbanup.com/1685812
53. (wank) (1↑, 3↓)
Anything good or positive. (Used as all types of parts of speech)

I just got a wank score on my test. Her body is wank. I want to wank tonight. That wank car is fast.

Author: thewanksterofnooches http://wank.urbanup.com/4436596
54. (wank) (2↑, 4↓)
A wank is a person who is an absolute dickhead or cunt

'omg jack bailed on me again..hes such a wank\!" "your a wank' " dont worry about sarah shes just a wank"

55. (wank) (16↑, 18↓)
To [masturbate]. In men, accomplished by taking the penis in the fist and moving up and down until ejaculation. (This may not be possible for [circumcised] men, but who cares about them?) Other more complex methods are also available.

I was wanking last night, because I was horny.

56. (wank) (13↑, 15↓)
to masturbate at a leisurely pace

yank the plank spank the monkey stroke the solami pet the one eyed trouser snake and what you would do in to your bizzles mouth

57. (Wank) (6↑, 9↓)
To stimulate the male penis by masturbating

Barron was wanking in his bathroom after he got blue balls.

58. (wank) (2↑, 6↓)
Although 'wank' usually refers to masturbation, in Philadelphia, it is used for absolutely anything. Similar in meaning to 'jawn,' 'wank' bascially takes on the verb form. 'Wank' is predominantly used when something small is done or accomplished.

Me: Look at muh beautiful half-court J nigga\! Niggaz: Shyt you aint makin this jawn nigga\! Who you tryna play? Me: (Makes Shot) Wank.

59. (wank) (4↑, 8↓)
1.) to bitch or complain or whine

"I wanted the blue lollipop, not the green one." The little boy wanked.

60. (wank) (19↑, 23↓)
Jerkin' the Gherkin

Oh yeah.....sputt, sputt, ______)- - - ( . )( . )

Author: Sacha Baron Cohen http://wank.urbanup.com/1291383
61. (wank) (3↑, 8↓)
1. (verb) To play excessively uninteresting and self-indulgent guitar solos, usually live on stage, and usually to the collective eye-roll of all in attendance except those who actually fall for [wankery]. 2. (noun) The offending guitarist.

Music Lover 1: oh man this guitarist sucks\! he's just wanking up there. don't the other guys in the band care that he totally fucking sucks? Music Lover 2: no idea, man, i have no idea how this gets on stage. what a frickin wank that guy is.

62. (wank) (9↑, 14↓)
To vigorously and repeatedly move the handle of a mechanical device.

As in this instruction to the crew of a small boat in trouble: "Come on, wank that pump handle or this bloody cow will sink..."

63. (wank) (2↑, 8↓)
Common slang for [marijuana]. Great code word to use around parents and teachers.

"Yo man, you tryna chill after class and get this wank in the tank?"

64. (wank) (3↑, 9↓)
the hardcore meaning of the word "whack"

hey drain - o you and chipmonk look like poopoo you guys are wank\!

65. (wank) (5↑, 13↓)
A generally undesirable person.

"That guy is a total wank"

66. (Wank) (5↑, 14↓)
since when was it pronounced wane-k anyway? it's a single-syllable word pronounced 'wank' just like it appears. 1. to masturbate 2. general derogatory term

1. he was wanking to the sound of music 2. be quiet, you stupid wank

67. (wank) (12↑, 21↓)
it's not pronounced wane-k you moron \!\!\!\!\!

wanc

68. (wank) (5↑, 18↓)
term used to throw off parental units when describing whereabouts

mom: kevi where are you??? kevin: zork. wank\!

69. (wank) (13↑, 26↓)
its rubbish its crap

naahhh thats wank m8 nah

70. (wank) (10↑, 26↓)
Enjoying the charms of Lady Palm and her five daughters

Right, I'm off to enjoy the charms of Lady Palm and her five daughters

Author: Willy Wanker http://wank.urbanup.com/29606
71. (Wank) (8↑, 25↓)
Something that is really bad.

Man, that game is wank\!

72. (wank) (9↑, 26↓)
Abbreviation for the West Bank in New Orleans LA

Lets head over to the wank.

73. (wank) (6↑, 23↓)
To play unnecessarily complex guitar leads very fast. Guitar diahreah.

I went to an Yngwie Malmsteen concert and all I heard him do was wank.

74. (wank) (11↑, 29↓)
Visiting Palmalla Handerson and her five closest friends

I assumed the position and then handed me to Palmalla Handerson and her five closest friends

75. (wank) (3↑, 24↓)
a word used when trying to explain your whereabouts to your parents

"Where are you Kevin?" "Uh. wank. zlurp. kweep. roger's house. WAAAANK\!"

76. (wank) (2↑, 25↓)
When you eat way too fast and you cant breath for a second. happens most often with foods like [fries] or [subs] but if you're a teenage boy eating with other teenage boys, it happens with just about anyting

oh shit im wankin so bad.

77. (wank) (12↑, 35↓)
a mo fuckin welfare check

bitch\! cash dat wank\!

78. (wank) (3↑, 28↓)
(wank) n.1.A male of Connecticut descent who enjoys air duster, ketamine, molly, cocaine, and gambling. 2. Someone who routinely refers to members of the opposite sex as a "whore" or a "money grubbing whore".

Hey wank, put down that airduster and go to sleep.

Author: The Professa http://wank.urbanup.com/1719853
79. (Wank) (2↑, 28↓)
"What Charmed(Male on Xerocreative.com) does while thinking of JubJub(Male on Xerocreative.com) Note: JubJub isn't gay but Charmed is\!

OMFG KNOWBIE I GOT IT ALL OVER MY HAND\! MAN JUBJUB REALLY GOT TO ME THIS TIME\! MAN I HOPE jUBJUB WANKS WHILE THINKING OF ME\!

Author: [GoD]Charmed also Charmed http://wank.urbanup.com/1157659
80. (wank) (8↑, 35↓)
a stupid bastard who is retarded beyond comprehension

god you a fuckin wank

81. (wank) (3↑, 32↓)
a word used when trying to explain your whereabouts to your parents

"Where are you Kevin?" "Uh. Wank. zlurp. kweep. roger's house. WAAAANK\!"

82. (wank) (8↑, 37↓)
the wank is a shortened term for the Westbank, located on the western bank of New Orleans, Louisiana

Since i am from the wank, i am a wanksta.

83. (wank) (5↑, 37↓)
A sound like that of a duck, someones squeaky pants or the sound of someone becoming aroused

The hallway was silent until I heard a wank.

84. (wank) (2↑, 49↓)
hardcore fish

softcore dogs are wimps

Author: serial fish. http://wank.urbanup.com/184852
85. (wank) (3↑, 52↓)
the same as [cum], it is expelled when enjoying intercourse either with yo self or with another person..... it is a smelly, white, sticky subatance

i wanked on her tits

Author: ashley brooke http://wank.urbanup.com/663678
86. (wank) (16↑, 87↓)
1. (n.) American slang for someone of British residence or lineage. Started as a reaction to the Brits' use of [yank], this American use of [wank] is fitting because it sums up the United Kingdom in one unmistakably British word. 2. (v.) A predominantely British term for masturbation. (see: [wanker], [bloody wanker])

\<Lara_S\> damn yank \<Raccoon\> silly wank

Related: masturbate, masturbation, wanking, cum, sex, wanker, jerk off, shit, jack off, toss, penis, masterbate, cock, jizz, jerk, dick, porn, fuck, fap, spunk, tug, masterbation, masturbating, spank the monkey, sperm, choke the chicken, hand job, ejaculate, cunt, handjob, semen, spank, poo, orgasm, crap, beat off, gay, jacking off, toss off, jack
Last updated: 2012.03.01

Urban English dictionary. 2013.

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